IWTBH: How on Earth does a skateboarder become a financial advisor?

GW: I stumbled upon a book,“The Motley Fool Guide”. It piqued my interest and I started taking classes.

IWTBH: You skate and surf. Who’s hotter. Surfer girls or skater girls?

GW: Are you kidding me? surf chicks, no question.

IWTBH: Who is cooler, surfers or skaters?

GW: Skaters are rad and surfers are not rad. Do not put that in there.

IWTBH: I won’t, I promise. How would you describe your personal style?

GW: Ahhhhh. Levi’s and Dickies.

IWTBH: Favorite Dickies color?

GW: Tan.

IWTBH: Do you have to wear a suit and tie?

GW: No, but I often do.

IWTBH: Favorite shoe?

GW: Vans Chukka Boots.

IWTBH: Style icons?

GW: The Fonze. Leather jacket and a white t-shirt –classic. A working man’s James Dean. And my Dad. We lost him this year. He could fix anything. Wore Dickies and a rag sweater.

IWTBH: I was so sorry to hear about your dad. He sounds like he was a great guy.

GW: Thanks, he was.

IWTBH: What’s your favorite surf shop?

GW: Favorite board is Pearson Arrow. Favorite shop here in SF is Mollusk.

IWTBH: Skate shop?

GW: Mackie’s.

IWTBH: Board?

GW: Krooked, “Dan Drehobl”, deck. Spitfire classic wheels and Independent trucks.

IWTBH: Your wife, for whom I have a healthy respect (fear), warned me not to ask you any filthy sexual questions. So, here I don’t go. Did you ever experiment in college? Try a Tantric H.J.? Date more than three girls at once? Have a Dutch rudder? Grind a skate groupie? Dry hump a walrus? Duck dive under a Betty?

GW: A what? Not that I know of.

IWTBH: What event in your life changed you the most?

GW: Getting married, starting a family. I wasn’t just making decisions for myself anymore.

IWTBH: What was your last huge purchase?

GW: Home renovations.

IWTBH: How many boards can you ollie?

GW: I can safely say five… I might be able to float six but definitely five.

IWTBH: How many boobs can you Ollie?

GW: Depends…

IWTBH: Should I defer my 401k?

GW: Fund it. Max fund it.

IWTBH: Did you ever have to investigate the death of your adopted Vietnamese brother when he showed up dead after discovering an error in the shipping records at his place of work?

GW: Seriously? Gleaming The Cube? If you want to talk skate movies let’s talk about Thrashin‘. That’s the best.

IWTBH: So it’s your assertion that Josh Brolin did a better job portraying the life of a skater than Christian Slater?

GW: Definitely. But it was Michael J. Fox in “Back To The Future” that made me want to skate.

IWTB: He made me want to spend all of my spare time with a free wheeling older scientist who showed an unhealthy interest in teenage boys. Favorite skate video?

GW: Blind Skateboards Video Days by Spike Jonze is the best.

IWTBH: Favorite skate mag?

GW: Low Card.

IWTBH: Favorite band?

GW: Zeppelin. Coda is the best. I just re-bought it. and I’ve been listening to Dinosaur Jr a lot.

IWTBH: That reminds me. Did you hear that they recently discovered the first gay dinosaur?

GW: No way, really?

IWTBH: Yes, “Megasoreass”.

GW:…

IWTBH: Last music purchase?

GW: Neil young. Rust Never Sleeps.

IWTBH: Such a great album. First concert?

GW: I grew up going to punk shows in Boston. The Freeze, Slapshot, Youth of Today, Sick of it All. I still use my signature mosh pit move when I crash into the reef.

IWTBH: What’s your favorite drink?

GW: Bud.

IWTBH: Bud?

GW: Bud. Its reliable, it’s underrated.

IWTBH: Hmmm… Do you have a hero?

GW: I recently fanned out on Mark Mothersbaugh from Devo.

IWTBH: Hilarious. Favorite skaters?

GW: Lance Mountain, and of course Mark Gonzales. A great new guy is Raven Tershy.

IWTBH: Best trip?

GW: We just went on a skate trip to Oregon for a buddy’s bachelor party. Some of the best stuff to skate is up there.

IWTBH: So you still skate as hard as ever?

GW: No way. Now that I’m older I like to stick to transitions…

IWTBH: What do you drive?

GW: I drive a Prius but whenever I can I rent a PT Cruiser.

IWTBH: What? That is the worst car ever.

GW: Actually the Pontiac Aztec is the worst car ever. I love the PT Cruiser because it’s fun to look like a total jackass for 48 hours.

IWTBH: I don’t need a PT Cruiser for that.

GW: No, you don’t.

IWTBH: Last question. You can have 50 million dollars but you have to spend either every other day, week, or month confined to a super max prison. Yes or no?

GW: No way.

IWTBH: Thanks, Greg.

 

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